Terry's Unseelie Delusion

Terry dashes through trees, pitchfork in hand, rushing toward the source of the corrupting incursion. His frame is even larger than usual, having been blessed by Stinky with the spell "Enlarge." He failed the roll to discern that Enlarge cannot be learned by clerics.

Stinky sits on his shoulder, wearing her old habit and vestments. They are mostly the same as real life, but with the inclusion of a circular cut-out on the chest to reveal cleavage. Oh, yeah - there are also cut-outs around her armpits, but such details are irrelevant. Terry is on a mission, the same mission he's been on for the many tendays since the Ripple threw his peaceful life into chaos: protect the Sanctuary, protect his family.

Terry skids to a stop in front of a nascent portal. A horrific, ogre-like beast with tusks, razor sharp talons, and huge perky tits drops out of it with a thud. It roars at Terry and Stinky, emitting a sparkling cloud of purple blight from its maw. Terry sizes the creature up and readies his weapon.

"Terry!" Stinky exclaims as she climbs down to the ground, "be careful sweetie!"

Terry rushes to the monster, aiming his pitchfork at its gut. It leaps into the air with unexpected grace, gripping onto a branch above with its gigantic claws. Terry stops and hurls the pitchfork at the beast. With a swing and flip the creature launches itself at him just as the pitchfork embeds itself into the branch. Terry raises his hands and braces himself for impact. When it connects, he's knocked onto his back and the creature begins clawing at his fuzzy pectorals. Stinky says a speedy prayer and Terry's wounds close as quickly as they're opened. He finally manages to throw off the voluptuous monster, jumping to his feet and squaring his stance as it lunges again. This time, he's able to fend off its slashes and land a few of his own.

Suddenly, amid a flurry of blows, Terry hears Stinky cry out. He pushes the monster away and glances over, seeing two undead corpses closing in on her. With a flick of his hand he calls out to the forest for aid. A multitude of branches and vines latch onto the two zombies and tear them to shreds. He turns his attention back to the busty ogre.

It's used the opportunity afforded by the minor distraction to dislodge a boulder from the soil, and now winding up to hurl it at Terry. Terry moves aside and catches it, allowing its momentum to swing him around in a circle before launching it back toward the sender. The ogre raises its claws in defense, but to no avail. The boulder lands a direct hit, sending the creature flying into a beefy tree and pinning it in place. The head of a dryad emerges from the trunk just above, seemingly bothered by the commotion. She looks down and examines the shapely beast briefly before dragging it into the tree with her. A moment later, a shower of wet bones rain down from its boughs.

"You're a hero, Terry! You've saved me and our home, once again! I'm going to suck your shit until it stings!" Exclaims Stinky.

Terry purses his lips and glances at her, puzzled by his beloved's unusual turn of phrase. He looks down at his wisdom saving throw. It's only a 9, so he doesn't think any harder about it. The happy couple run toward each other and he scoops her up into his gigantic arms. With a graceful dip, the pair begin making out loudly. The Ripple has been a long series of exhausting trials, but with Stinky here to heal him physically and emotionally, Terry's pride greatly exceeds his fatigue.

With Stinky cradled in his arms, he turns around toward the homestead, revealing two perfectly round ass cheeks that are comically huge, even taking his current stature into consideration. They jiggle gracefully as he jogs back home, looking like two furry glazed hams.